No Handbook

“You were not born with a handbook attached to your umbilical cord.” A sentence that became revelatory to me as much as it did to my children the first time I said it. Feeling confused about how to communicate with them, knowing that I had just blown it big time. While also wanting them to know that my heart was absolutely the total opposite of my actions, those words came forth and we all let out a sigh.

The sentence was followed with an apology and some real frank communication. How do you tell your elementary school children that you aren’t perfect and that even if you weren’t a single mom, you’d probably still screw up this moment? You just tell them.

About two decades have passed since the first time I said those words. I still say them today. Never as an excuse, but as an acknowledgement, that I am not perfect and I never will be and then we talk, we listen, we respect and even if we agree to disagree, we love.

No handbook was created to help you navigate the moments in life where you feel like a fish out of water and totally helpless. That moment when you know that you’re screwing up, and need some grace. The moment when you realize you might be acting like your parents/guardians (and not in a good way). Yet, you are perfectly parenting your children.

Yep, I said it…. perfectly parenting them. No one sneaks into this universe on God. We were all created for a purpose, on purpose to fulfill a purpose. Every mistake that you make molds your children just as much as every moment that you get it right. So make no excuses, own it all and step into your moments of imperfection willing to not only show your children who you are, but to learn from them as much as you teach them.